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SPEAKING POLITICALLY CORRECT

She does not: GET PMS She becomes: HORMONALLY HOMICIDAL

She does not have: A KILLER BODY She is: TERMINALLY ATTRACTIVE

She is not: A BAD COOK She is: MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE

She is not: A BAD DRIVER She is: AUTOMOTIVELY CHALLENGED

She is not: A PERFECT 10 She is: NUMERICALLY SUPERIOR

She is not: EASY She is: HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE

She does not: CUT YOU OFF She becomes: HORIZONTALLY INACCESSIBLE

She does not: HATE SPORTS ON TV She is: ATHLETICALLY BIASED

She does not have: SEXY LIPS She is: COLLAGEN DEPENDENT

She does not get: DRUNK She is: ACCIDENTALLY OVER-SERVED

You do not ask her: TO DANCE You request a: PRE-COITAL RHYTHMIC EXPERIENCE

She is not: A GOSSIP She is a: VERBAL TERMINATOR

She does not: WORK OUT TOO MUCH She is an: ABDOMINAL OVERACHIEVER

She does not have: A GREAT BUTT She is: GLUTEUS TO THE MAXIMUS

She is not: HOOKED ON SOAP OPERAS She is: MELODRAMATICALLY FIXATED

She is not: COLD OR FRIGID She is: THERMALLY INCOMPATIBLE

She does not: WEAR TOO MUCH MAKE-UP She is: COSMETICALLY OVERSATURATED

She will never: GAIN WEIGHT She will become: A METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER

She is not: A SCREAMER OR MOANER She is: VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE

She does not: SHAVE HER LEGS She experiences: TEMPORARY STUBBLE REDUCTION

She does not have: A HARD BODY She is: ANATOMICALLY INFLEXIBLE

She does not: SUN BATHE She experiences: SOLAR ENHANCEMENT

She does not: SHOP TOO MUCH She is: OVERLY SUSCEPTIBLE TO MARKETING PLOYS

She does not have: BIG HAIR She is: OVERLY AEROSOLED

She does not: SNORE She is: NASALLY REPETITIVE

She does not: GET DRUNK She becomes: VERBALLY DYSLEXIC

She is not: TOO SKINNY She is: SKELETALLY PROMINENT

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